Four Months Departed

Unbelievably to me, I am fast approaching the four month mark away from home. This is the longest period i have ever spent away from home and it is bewildering to think how quickly the weeks have passed me by.

Only now has life fallen into some sort of routine. I do not know if routine is the right word for this actually. Last weekend i was in Las Vegas, on Wednesday i was at a gig at the OC State Fair and on Monday i am going to another gig. That is some sort of routine... Pretty much, i just still feel like i am on holidays as long as i am not at work. Frequently i am going out mid-week, having a few drinks, seeing some sights and almost being a tourist. Work is enjoyable though. The actual tasks as much as keeping busy and having a use.

The three months prior presented a massive opportunity for me. As I was not working and had no real engagements at all, there was a lot of time i had to delegate. In this time I could have written my piece de resistance, gotten super fit and desirable, taught myself to play guitar, become and excellent chef... the options were limitless. The only limit, the sky.

Alas, I did not do any of these things. Instead I watched baseball, ate too much, drank too much, spent too much and had trouble getting to sleep before 3am. Was it laziness? Jet lag? Homesickness?Lack of motivation? A combination of them all?! Who knows! Do i regret this time seemingly wasted when Laura was working or studying, Australia was sleeping and the Giants were not playing? Short answer yes but i am going to try and justify it!

I have worked out at least two things about myself due to this time and these are both aspects of me which i am okay with. Firstly, I am chill enough to cope with downtime. I am absolutely able to relax and, come the right time, I will be the best damn retiree around. At this point my mindset will change from "there is nothing i can not do!" to the more realistic "there is nothing to do!" and i will be fine with that. My body will cope.

Secondly, my new life has been 5,000x busier since beginning work. I exercise, i write, i cook, i socialise, i play. Maybe it is me desperately trying to regain hours lost to work but either way i do a lot more and want to do more. by doing things, i am motivated to do even more again. Perhaps this is not just me but something in human nature thing (not the Motown group) but either way it is a promising development for me getting the most out of my remaining time in the United States.

I suppose self discovery is one thing but putting things into action is another. Hopefully i would not waste such an opportunity in the future when it comes to spare time. I think the ball just needs to be set into motion. And as the immortal Mick Jagger has proven, a rolling stone gathers no moss.