I thought it was about time that i started a series showing how close America and Australia really were. Because the truth is, we are almost the same country. Heck, even inhabitants of America are so similar to those you find in Australia that you may wonder if they are, in fact, that same person.
For the sake of leaving 'em happy, which is what i am all about. I am going to start with the negatives and then finish with the positives. No one likes finishing on a bad note so i think this is the best course of action. My ending note here is an absolute cracker and is quite topical considering it is Summer down under so i hope it makes up for the people i am about to bring up.
Numbers 1 and 2. Rush Limbaugh and Alan Jones
Ughhhhh. If these two repulsive individuals were not so similar i would talk about something more pleasant. Like Japanese whaling or something... but here we are. Although the Pacific Ocean separates them, they are almost the same person. Conservative, aggressive radio-casters who do not give their opposition the opportunity to give their point of view across (especially if they are university accredited).
Both of these peddlers of conservative, political agendas are the beneficiaries of talkback AM radio which has netted them mega salaries whilst, at the same time, sticking up for the little guy who they supposedly represent. Both have run into trouble for inciting hatred towards ethnic minorities and also are quite outspoken on the issue of climate change. This comes as somewhat of a surprise seeing as neither of them have any sort of qualification in climatology and rely on "scientific" evidence which appears to be refuted by every other scientist in the field. The claims by each of these disc jockeys seem to support a certain political agenda while they reject all other evidence and accuse it of being political propaganda.
Both Rush Limbaugh and Alan Jones have made a career out of hatred, fear and paranoia. Relying on racist, aged callers to back up their agendas and boost their ratings to justify their massive pay packets. Perhaps a juke box playing Top 40 Nonsense would draw a similar audience - it would definitely be more eloquent - but the stations appear hesitant to take such a risk.
I promised a more positive ending and by golly do i have it here! but let's take time out of this announcement to talk about Nathan's hotdogs mmmm mmm!! This is the sort of segue American baseball lovers are used to. Especially if they are LA Dodgers fans. The cash for comments may be more reminiscent of the first two people but Vin Scully has been doing it for years and he does it with class and refinement. That old voice (which has always seemed old), knowing aura and dry wit... There is no way anybody could watch an Australian cricket match and a Dodgers baseball broadcast and not see the similarities between Richie Benaud and Vin Scully.
Both are totally synonymous with their sports and both bring a certain wry, humour to their broadcast. They are also always impeccably dressed. Benaud in his bone jacket and Scully in whatever suit he grabs from his rack that day (let's face it, those Dodgers have a big budget!). I could not help but see that people in America feel that Scully is the voice of baseball. Much in the same way that Benaud is the voice of Summer cricket in Australia. If you hear their voices you know exactly what time it is. It is time to see Gonzalez and Puig at the top of the mark... or Clarke and Watson standing at the crease. A sharp wit and an ability to paint a descriptive picture has meant that these commentators are still in the business.. despite them both being over 80 years old.
Long story short these two men are national treasures. There will be no replacements. Ever. And we are lucky to live in an era where we get to hear their mellifluous voices calling the games we love. Hearing either of them call a game is the best way to take part in each sport and, years down the line, when you hear ex players and supposed experts giving their two cents, you will tell your grandchildren of the good old days of Richie Benaud (or Vin Scully). You will realise you have turned into your parents. Realise that you are old now. That tequila don't go down so easy. That you should have gone to Cinque Terra when you had the chance. That you should have invested in a tattoo removal service and that every commentator to ever follow will have the highest of standards to uphold.
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